hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
