So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
