i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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