I think im going to throw up on grandma
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize