yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize
