i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
