nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
