that's an acceptable place to lick
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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