At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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