just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
