Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Randomize
