All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Randomize
