Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Randomize