I wanna bring you to show and tell
My sheets look like a crime scene.
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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