He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
