I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
