we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
