Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
