god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Randomize
