Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize