At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize