His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize