How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize