great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
