Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
