in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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