just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
