Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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