If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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