So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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