your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I am naked and annoyed.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
