put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
