So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
