So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
