I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
