Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
