By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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