So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Randomize
