I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
