I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
