Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
