The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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