This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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