It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
