Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
