I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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