I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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