Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
