lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
