Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
