Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
